After having run my own dating service for several years and having had the opportunity to study the reaction to various advert formats, responses etc. I am now giving you the opportunity to benefit from the collective failures of thousands of people! Free! You're welcome.

To get the most out of a dating service and find a lifelong partner check out these top 10 dating tips.

1. Many dating services encourage you to upload a photo. This is good for their business but it is also ESSENTIAL for you. The vast majority of searchers will exclude adverts without a photograph from the search so you may never even be seen without one.

2. If you do use a photo, think carefully about which pictures to use. Guys - don't use that picture of you after a joyous amount of beer. Let her find out the horrible truth of who you really are in her own time. Ladies - don't use a photo of you with your ex-boyfriend snipped out. I know you like the dress you were wearing in that picture but trust me on this one.

3. Get a friend to take a photo of you on your own. One facial and one full-length if possible. Make an effort to look happy, relaxed and natural. Don't go to a studio and have a model shoot as they may be assumed to be fake.

4. When I had to check the adverts for my site I was really struck with how badly they can be written. The truth is they are generally rushed. We write them like we do e-mails and so quality suffers. Write your advert in a word processor first - use the spellchecker, proof read it and when you are happy with it - post it. This also has the advantage that you can cut-and-paste it into several sites.

5. Think about what you want to say. Tell the person a little about yourself and what you are looking for in a partner. Guys - try to say a little more about yourself than what sports you like and do not mention sex. Really. Ladies - just keep on writing them like you do. You can hint at sex if you like. Really.  One guy wrote on my site that he had an unusual hobby and would tell you about it if you replied to his advert. I loved that. It threw in an air of mystery and a desire to contact the person to find out more. Clever huh?

6. Two more quick points about writing adverts. Be positive. Don't write things like "Just checking out the site" or "Bored and lonely". Secondly, do not write one or two line adverts. Frankly if you can't put in any effort then you are either lazy or you can't really be that interested in meeting someone and the reader will pick up on this.

7. Find out how the site orders the adverts in the search results so that you can manipulate it to come out at the top of the list. For example some sites list in the order that the adverts were created or updated. If this is the case then go in and save the advert again so that yours jumps to the top of the search results. More people will see your advert and will know that you are still looking to find a partner.

8. As with writing an advert it is important to write a good response to other people's adverts. Use that word processor again to create a well written piece about yourself and then for each advert you respond to, add an extra paragraph that relates to what the other person wrote and show an interest in finding out more about them.

9. Next, don't always think that putting your advert up is all you need to do. If everyone were to wait for someone else to contact them then there would be no point to it all. Browse around and if you find 5 or 6 people you think you could connect with then JOIN the service and send them a message. You are more likely to get a response from someone who joined the site recently so keep checking back, every night if you can.

10. Always respond to messages you receive, even if you are not interested. Remember that it is another human being that wrote to you and they will be checking their mail box for the response. It can be disappointing to get a 'thanks, but no thanks' but it is less stressful than waiting for a response that never comes.